How to Disappear & Find New Life


Have you ever disappeared?  Have you ever gone into hiding - turned off your phone, detoxed from digital, left everything behind for a while?  Or better yet, have you ever deactivated (or even deleted!) your social media accounts, ditched the phone entirely, gone completely off the grid?

It sounds scary, but like most things, fear of doing it is worse than actually doing it.  For most of us, this might even sound impossible.  But when you think about it, we are all searching for something, and amid all the distractions of everyday life, it’s no wonder we can sometimes feel like we are going nowhere fast.  Instead of waiting for the winds to change, consider taking some drastic steps put that wind in your sails and give you new life:

  1. No phone days: instituting one day a week when you keep the phone in a drawer for the full day has been one of the most beneficial things I’ve done for my relationship this year.  Notice just how often you reach for your phone to avoid being alone with your thoughts.  This really helps with breaking that habit, and restores presence.

  2. No-plan weekends: give yourself entirely open, plan-free weekends. Maybe you can swing an alarm-free morning, take leisurely dog walks, see a matinee, do yoga in your living room, try something new (I recommend trying a float deprivation tank if you haven’t already).  Instead of being overscheduled and giving all your energy to your predetermined plans, give yourself your full attention.  Your weekend will feel longer.  And don’t we all want longer weekends?

  3. Deactivate your accounts: in early recovery I deleted (not deactivated, DELETED) my Facebook account and deactivated everything else.  I even got a new email address.  This really helped during a time when I needed to detach from my old life in order to make space for a new one to grow.  Try it for for a week and afterwards, see if what you miss more, the hours of scrolling or the hours of free time.

  4. Vipassana mediation course: if all of these are easy for you, go off the grid for 10 days, and I mean seriously off the grid.  Take 10 days to tune out the buzz of the world and sit in stillness.  No phones or screens of any kind, no books, no writing.  No talking, no eye contact. Just you for 10 days.  It’s scary, and it’s life changing.

Caela Berry